Why I Love Where I Am…

I’ve always had an insanely amazing relationship with my parents. My dad takes all the credit, says he was tough in the beginning so he’d have less to do later, but I think it’s really because I am the biggest parent lover in the entire world and they just got lucky. 

University of Maryland has been in the family for generations, I’m talking parents, grandparents, the whole thing, so while it was a question of where I would go, it was never a question of where my parents wanted me to go. Terp is in our blood. We basically bleed red, black, white, and gold.

Every student goes through the college (panic) process where they really have to sit down and think if a school is really for them. Lucky for me, UGA, my almost top choice, got ruled out because I didn’t make honors there, so it was Maryland or bust. Well not bust, I had plenty of other options. Just none of them screamed “you belong with me” quite like a fancy turtle & an Under Armour partnership.

Every day I thank my lucky stars that I was rejected from Georgia honors because it brought me so much closer to a world that means so much to my parents, especially my Dad. Walking the streets of College Park I can’t help but feel so tied to my family history here. Not to be sappy, but I think college makes you really become the person you are and it can really define you, and I am so fortunate to get to experience a place that took such a big part in creating my parents’ identities.

Standing in the middle of my Dad’s Delta Tau Delta tailgate back during football season (think a giant neightboorhood Dad party but with Fireball and Helluvah dip) I couldn’t help but feel so connected to him. For the rest of our lives, we will both love something so much and I can’t even express how much that means to me.

I guess the point is that I am so happy to be back at good ole UMD. Even when it’s stressful and hard and overwhelming (hint hint, foreshadowing my upcoming semester), the thought that I share this place with the two greatest people I know only makes me fall more in love with being here.

Thank you for giving me the opportunity to share something so special with you. I promise not to go toooooo far for grad school. But the city still calls.


Stuck in my head: Morocco // Moon Taxi
Snap this pic: College Park

I say lucky waaaaaay too many times in this post. BRB, signing up for Thesaurus.com’s word of the day email right now.

Also just a disclaimer, this was written waaaay back when and totally neglected until now. I’m trying to get my stuff together here before it all hits the fan and I lose my sanity & free time. & it’s never too late to show some parent love. 

The Age Dilemma.

While my mom may still write some of my important emails, there’s nothing I love more than getting dressed up & hopping on the metro to intern. Cava is an absolute dream to me- great people, great projects, great (free) food. And I’m so excited to see what next semester of hummus and harissa will bring.

But see, there’s this other phenomenon that has been swirling around my head for a couple months now… the summer intership. Somehow, even as a freshman, the pressure to find the next big resume builder is always lingering in the shadows. Call it a craving for success or a flaw in the whole college thing. You decide.

Now, for me, I think internships are different. I’ve only ever worked in positions I loved (I mean, hello, who doesn’t want to monitor Instagram and Pinterest all day), and because of it I think I have a strange perception of working where everyone loves their job more than their children and finding your ~dream~ job is just a matter of working hard enough to get it. 

Here’s a little context- if you know me, you know I am extremely ambitous. Some would call it overzealous. I call it determined. I’ve known the path I want to follow (career wise) for a while, which has led me to connect other passions to the same purpose. During my not-so-brief Taylor Swift stalker days I researched where her marketing team was HQed so I knew where I would have to move after college (side note: the internet seems to think she’s her own marketing genius, but there’s obviously a team behind her…I mean really… come on, Google). From there my love for food, fashion, and fitness have sparked interests in other companies, most of which don’t necessarily need an 18 year old running around their office in a over-the-knee boots and retro Ray Bans. 

But here’s the thing, I love to work. I find putting fingers to keyboard and putting together work I’m proud of the most satisfying part of a day. Sure getting As is great, I mean I’m the spokesperson for them, I love them more than a perfectly poached egg, I feel as though I could potentially die without them, but completing a task in *the real world* gives me the triumph of feeling one step closer to a DC apartment and an inbox full of emails. & I don’t work to finish, most every project I do I aim to exceed expectations. You want the names of 10 local businesses, I’ll give you 20. You want the project by Friday, I’ll have it on your desk in an hour. I’m not your average college student. I work to kill & I still get 9 hours of sleep a night. 

So, now on to my frustration with the whole work world. With an attitude like mine, it’s still impossible to be a candidate on paper when you’re this young. A couple work experiences, one semester of college, zero business school classes. I mean come on, I might as well just sleep my way through summer.

But hey, that’s never been my style. So I guess I’ll just try twice as hard, work twice as fast, and write twice as many cover letters. Yeah, that’s more like it.

I mean, it’s Summer, who needs the ocean when you can have an office. 

Stuck in my head: Shape of You // Ed Sheeran
Snap it: Adams Morgan

I have some internship leads. I’m working on it. Surprised? You shouldn’t be. 

Screw it, I’m Going Out Tonight

First semester was a lot. It’s been kind of like dipping my toe in the pool to a life I only knew through movies, magazines, and my parent’s stories. & no lie the adjustment has been real. Part of me feels like I’ll never stop missing being able to make eggs in a kitchen that has been ~for real~ cleaned or having a closet that I can actually fit my boots into, but none the less, there’s a certain something that keeps me missing the Terp life while I’m away. 

I’m starting to see a pattern in my latest posts- LISTS. Maybe it’s because they’re fast and easy and I have about 10 seconds to write this. But, I’ll try and break the habit over break. Adding it to the to-do list right now…

Top three things I learned about myself, my school, and my distaste for being alone:

Not Always One and the Same. 

Everyone’s college experiences have different circumstances and I’ve learned a lot about different family and relationship dynamics that I hadn’t been exposed to before. Nothing is picture perfect, and I think its been really valuable to catch glimpses at how people deal with and learn from not-so-fun situations.

I’ve really had to master the idea that sometimes you can’t help someone fix themselves because you aren’t where they’re coming from. It’s really easy to say to do something or to try to put yourself in their shoes, but when you don’t have the genuine emotions and attachment, there’s a disconnect that can’t be forged through listening. Honestly, I’m still learning this lesson. I love to be the Dr. Phil & make all my friends’ problems just fade away, but sometimes you can’t. No, I’m not a psychology major. Just a loving person.

Being alone doesn’t make you alone. 

Key lesson, learn it now: spending time by yourself doesn’t equate having no friends and being a loner. It means that everyone here is on a different time schedule and even if you want a lunch-buddy, sometimes you have to settle for Netflix.

Believe me, spend days and nights alone on end and you’ll start to lose it, but that’s when it’s really important for you to have someone to fall onto. I’ve realized the best way to have plans is to make plans. Sometimes you have to make sacrifices- give up your warm, amazing bed to venture to the dorm next door for candy and girl talk, but once I became proactive about finding people to be with, the rest kind of fell into place. Nothing bonds friends faster than cold weather, a bag of sour gummy worms, and confessing cringe-worthy stories. 

But also, being alone means watching TV without headphones, sneezing without covering your mouth, and not having to share that bag of gummies. So enjoy your you-time. It’s not all bad.

You don’t have to be the smartest. You don’t have to get an A+.  

This has been the hardest thing for me to come to terms with. I’m a baby perfectionist with a love for high numbers and first letters of the alphabet. But for the first time in my academic life it’s not really realistic to get the best grades out there. I think a big part of it is that I expect my hardest, best work to be capable of getting an A+, when in reality, college classes aren’t designed that way.

I kind of regret how much energy I put into trying to get the highest grades possible because I feel like I missed out on some really memorable experiences. I’m not saying I didn’t enjoy first semester, because that’s 100% not true. I love the life I’ve made for myself, my friends, my routines, but I feel like the pressure to be perfect in the classroom has definitely been more than just a sticky note on my bulletin board of to-dos. Sometimes you just have to say “Screw it, I’m going out tonight.” Not sure how or when I’ll get there, but isn’t life just a work in progress? I’ve got potential. 

& As Olivia says to me after every not-so-hot test grade, “Cs Get Degrees.” 

So here’s to growing, changing, and learning to appreciate the fun in not having your nose in a textbook. Happy winter break. Never needed it more.

Stuck in my head: Drifting // On An On
Snap it: Filmore, Silver Spring (Jon Bellion)

Please pardon the fact that finals ended last week and this is being posted now. Everyone needs a couple minutes to just not care. I was taking mine. But no worries, I’m back and better than ever. 

15 Ways You Know Your Roommate is Your ~One True Love~

College can be super scary. Not going to lie, the first couple weeks were an adjustment. I had a horrible cold, less friends than fingers, and no idea how I was going to balance everything I’d committed to this semester. Looking back there are definitely some things I would change, but overall I’ve built a pretty good foundation here. Master freshman year- check. 

I really never thought I would find friends as funky and go-to as my high school buddies, and maybe I just got lucky, but I can’t imagine school without Lauren, Molly, Sabrina, Averie, & Olivia. There are still so many people out there to meet & I can’t wait to find more goofballs, but I love these girls. Now that the semester is ending I’m kind of panicking, what am I going to do without them for over a month?

I really want to focus in on one friend in particular, my lovely bed buddy, Oliveoco. Here’s the cutest/creepiest roommate story of the centry, so get ready. It’s totally When Harry Met Sally meets The Lovely Bones.

I found Olivia’s Facebook profile while stalking the UMD Scholars group online. She was one of 3 girls at the time. Me, some wierdo, and her. I friended her because her profile pictures were artsy, cute, and fun- three things I definitely wanted my college experiences to be. Little did I know that she was a high school poms captain, too. Was it fate? Duh. We swapped competition videos and thus began our six month internet friendship. Our first date was a group hang, where I met her two best friends, Molly and Dina, and she met some of mine. We shared sandwiches and Korean Tacos & explored Olney and DC together. I told you we were super adorable.

From late night dorm room chats to our usual table with Lauren in the dining hall (RIP us. Please mail food it’s already too cold to leave the dorm. We will probably starve this winter if you don’t send anything), I literally can’t imagine learning how to vacuum with everyone else. Besides agreeing to get married if we are both 50 and single, here are 15 ways I know I’m meant to be with my roommate forever… 

  1. She gives me the large amounts of attention I need to survive daily.
  2. She lets me keep tofu and quinoa and cheese sticks in our fridge… and sour patch kids in our freezer.
  3. She talks to me in her sleep because she loves me just that much.
  4. She motivates me to go to the gym when I so totally don’t want to.
  5. She doesn’t judge my candy addiction.
  6. She throws away all her extra candy because she knows I will want to eat it and she values my health & dental hygine.
  7. She can identify all my high school friends by name and college (bonus points if she knows their Instagram handles).
  8. She listens to me cry for no reason and doesn’t want to kill me afterwards.
  9. She sends me good luck messages on the reg. Nothing gets you pumped for an exam like a “you’re gonna kill this” text. If Olivia says you’re going to kill this, then you are 100% gonna kill this.  
  10. She also leaves me good luck sticky notes because goals.
  11. She has the same taste in music and has amazing Spotify playlists (Sleepy & Sad all the way baby).
  12. She lets me talk about subjects I’m definitely not super informed about (aka politics) just so I can practice sounding smart (the election was a thrilling time for room 2112 Cambrige Hall).
  13. She’s always down for a dorm room dance party & chill kind of night
  14. She gets extremely over excited about the little things in life & never fails to brighten your day.
  15. This list could honestly go on forever.

Transitions are always a little rough. Middle school to high school. Team member to captain. There’s sometimes a lot of bad that comes with the potentially good. I guess I just want to thank my internet friend/roommate/future fish owner (we’re going to adopt a fish eventually) for giving me a semester of bff memories. Love you from the chapel to the XFinity center.

And to all my other UMD sisters from other misters, your blog posts are coming, don’t you worry. 

Stuck in my head: White Blank Page // Mumford and Sons
Snap this: Union Market (again ugh just so photogenic and beautiful)

Blogging instead of studying? Totally going to kill this finals thing. 

Old Friends, New Victims.

The holidays are a merry time, I mean I’m not really one for reindeer sweaters, but gotta love candy canes and snow days. I know it’s only early December but the semester is wrapping up and I can’t help but wonder where the time went. It feels like just yesterday I unpacked my jean shorts. Well, jean shorts are officially out of season, but good news is snowsuits and parkas are in. Aka- perfect way to hide the Christmas cookie food baby. 

All the new friends I’ve made this year have really got me thinking about some oldies but goodies. And by oldies I mean friends from way back when. I won’t name names but there are some precious gems in the bunch. And now I’ve got to make a confession. I social media stalk them all. 

It’s not that I’m obsessed with them. I promise. I don’t know their college addresses or their bra sizes. I just wonder what they’re up to and I want to stay connected to their lives, even if I’m not really on their radars anymore.

Some friendships have an experation date– two crazy drama filled girls fall in love, one kisses the other’s boyfriend, bla bla bla, insert girl-fight here. None of these friendships were even close to that. Most of them faded because of distance and time, some I have no idea how we fell out of step. And as I make new friends and am forced to put myself out there for the first time in years, I’m kind missing some of my relationships that fell through the cracks. 

Why so reminiscent, J? This is soooo sad, how did you let this happen? Why don’t you just text them? Because I didn’t realize how valuable human connections were at the time. For some reason I let those friendships die to the point that I don’t know if I could text them anymore. It would probably be a super weird and awkward conversation. Something straight from the “Broken-up Couple” chapter. But it’s totally not my fault that I wonder what it would’ve been like to keep growing up with them.

Some of them have pretty freaking great lives now. I would’ve loved to visit them at college and get an earful of their new friend group gossip. But the past is the past and nothing is harder than rekindling a flame that’s been out for a while (I’ve never built a fire so I’m not totally sure, but I imagine). Basically this me saying I’m never unfollowing you because I guess there’s always some part of me that wants to be some kind of involved in your lives. Even if it’s just a like every now and then. I promise not to comment any old Facebook statuses (resurfacing is the woooorrrssttt) and I’ll try my hardest not to like ancient Instagrams. But keep me updated, because I still care.

And if you social media stalk me back, then maybe we should get lunch sometime and catch up. 

Stuck in my head: Welcome to Your Life // Grouplove
Snap it: somewhere in DC

When I say victims I mean social media stalking victims. I am not coming to kill you, I swear on chokers and bagels. 

I Got One Less P(CR)roblem Without You.

I’ve seemed to have found myself in the library with 38 minutes until my next class, 32% battery on my laptop, 3,000 other things I should be doing right now, and 1 important thing I want to share. 

If you’ve talked to me at all during the past semester I have undeniably brought up something called my PCR (Personal Creative Reflection). Aka- my super long paper/project for my How Innovators Think scholars course. Verdict- It was horrible. Reality- I am officially finished with it. 

Let me explain a little more about this experience. So, everyday for the past 5 weeks I’ve put in time into creating a culmination of everything I’ve learned in the past semester in my scholars program. This includes trips, guest speakers, class lectures, and outside of class experiences. And there has been a lot. And if you’re wondering, this is an assignment, not just something I decided to do because I’m fun and quirky and love innovation. 

While literally the bane of my existance, my PCR has taught me a lot about time management and creativity. Starting super duper early wasn’t really my idea, but a friend encouraged me by casually working on it every econ lecture until I stressed myself out and got down to business. This PCR owns many of my first semester Saturday nights and late night mental breakdowns. God bless tissues and coffee. 

There’s no other way I want to share the worst thing about this semester than through a blog about it. PCR, you will not be missed, I will probably never look at you again, and I really hope you don’t have any typos.

So, if you’re really bored or trying to procrastinate or just reeeeeaaaallllyyy love to read what I write, check it out. I’m going to assume the only people that will really read it are my professor and my Grandpa. And maybe, if I’m lucky, someone will plagarize from it next year and it can do some good for the world.

Until then, see you later PCR. You’re so not my problem anymore.

Stuck in my head: The Wire // HAIM
Snap it: DC Holiday Market outside National Portrait Gallery

I’ve linked it multiple times in this post so I don’t want to hear any “I couldn’t find it!” bullshit. But honestly, it’s so boring I don’t blame you if you don’t want to read it. 

Women in the Work(out) Force…

Let’s start with ancient history, shall we? Since the dawn of time women have competed. First it was for food, then it was for men, now it’s for everything from a husband on reality TV to the last pair of booties at the Nordstroms Annual Sale. And I’m not going to lie, I love a little competition as much as the next person, but there’s something else that’s really motivating about working out with strong women- they’re strong.

I am like a little baby gym rat. Love spin. Love bootcamp. Love body pump. Love it all. And up until I went to school, I was always surrounded by fit women more than twice my age while I exercised. And I loved it. I found it so motivational to be surrounded by all these adults that had real, busy lives and could still spin like there’s no tomorrow. There’ve been times where I’ve looked over and seen women lifting three times my weight, so what do I do? Add it on. If she can do it, so can I.

Whenever I see a woman in amazing shape, maybe she’s lifting hundreds or has amazing pushup form, I honestly just want to stop her and be like “GOALS.” It’s that feeling of hope, that could be me someday it could be me under that bar, that really pushes me forward. So thank you, strong ass women. I owe my exercise ability to you. 

Beyond that, there’s a motivation network you can build just through being surrounded by women as ready to challenge themselves as you. At school, during a particularly hard track the entire room bursts into counting down until it’s over. Somehow, screaming as you squat creates a community. We highfive as we wipe our sweat. The fatigue brings us closer. I love that feeling of girl power. 

Now, I can admit some of my workouts are a little quirky and horrible (think 1.5 hours on stairclimber), but I love love love going to the gym with friends & being part of a group of girls that really values exercise. I mean last weekend we literally slept for like 4 hours and still hit the gym the next day. Ladies keeping each other strong. Live for that kind of friendship. 

In the spirit of working out, I want to share some exciting news! I am getting certified to become a spin instuctor. I’m only 1 week, a 2 hour ride, a 6 hour training session, a textbook, and an online exam away from screaming at riders to get their RPMs above 80. But on the serious side, I’m excited to be a motivational force in someone’s work out. I think that a good teacher can spark a good habit, and I really hope I get the opportunity to make people fall in love with spinning the way my teachers have.

To wrap this up because spin class and turkey are calling, I want to say Happy Thanksgiving, Women At The Gym. Keep lifting. Keep stairclimbing. I’m sure I’ll need a little extra of your inspiration after my apple pie food baby sets in.

Stuck in my Head: All Time Low // Jon Bellion
Snap it: College Park Color Run (Warning: the color does not come out. Your ears will be blue forever)

No hate to guys at the gym. I just know I’ll never really be able to get your kind of muscle definition. But mad respect, you all do some crazy shit sometimes. I mean one handed pushups with kettlebells on your back, sick, but I’m not really trynna do that ever. I think I would break in half. 

Also shoutout to my favorite workout buddy, Marnie D. Metzman. Too bad Mike’s not here to whip our turkey filled bodies into shape. 

Tick tock…

In the grand scheme of things, a minute in your day is like a second in your whole life, yet I can’t help but hold every minute as dear as the next.

Something hit me recently, time might be my greatest source of anxiety, but it’s also my best friend. I’ve been gifted so many amazing people in my life and now it’s on me to take advantage of the clock.

Two things most people know about me- I am a huge crier & I love my family more than anything in the entire world. More than Instagram, more than spin classes, more than an supergreens bowl with extra falafel and a cup of Vanilla Bean Limeaid. Put the two together and you have me crying over every veterans coming home video, sentimental family scene in a movie, basically every time I think to hard about how lucky I am to have the life I do.

Stressing over time is normal for me. The simple thought of an analogue clock ticking the seconds away is enough to send me into a whirlwind of checking my day planner. Add the fear of missing out on precious family moments on top of that- enter stress sweats.

As I get older the people I love do, too, and my nightmares are full of running out of time with them. It’s why I’m not a huge fan of being away from home (& I’m just down the beltway). I’ve never experienced real pain before, and knowing that someday I will is really scary and paralyzing. But it’s not about waiting for that moment, it’s about seizing every moment before.

I’ve started consciously making more of an effort to keep in touch with the people I love. FaceTime me whenever, I’ll probably complain about some slew of homework assignments, but I will always have a free moment to appreciate our connection. Email me. Call me. Text. Twitter DM. Whatever it is, I want the notification. Today. 

When it comes down to it I just want the people who mean so much to me to feel the love that I feel for them all the time. I am a huge fan of a handwritten thank you note. Nothing is more genuine and heartwarming than taking the time to express gratitude, especially in this age of technology and ego. But instead of writing each of you a note, I want this to be my official thank you. It’s also a promise to grab every second by the pigtails because before I know it I’m going to be all grown up & my opportunity to learn from such amazing people may not be there anymore.

And to my most loyal reader, keep the comments coming. Nothing makes me smile wider.

& with finals around the corner I could use a couple extra smiles. 

Stuck in my head: Two of Us on the Run // Lucius
Snap it: KW

Happy Birthday to one of my fav readers- Mommy! Love you!!
Can’t wait for Thankgiving when the family will be whole again (@Sara why you gotta go so far away?)

Why I Finished That Donut…

Some of my all time favorite memories revolve around one single thing… food. It’s those bite filled moments that leave a mark on me and I think it’s because food has this innate power to bring people together. What screams friendship louder than a pizza? 

This weekend was one of reunions on many levels & each included a different series of entrees. Sitting next to my best friend, Christian, in a Cava talking for hours on end it was like those 3 months of separation never existed. Confessions over Crazy Feta. Housewives minus the wine. We all know by now that I’m weirdly emotional and attached to people who mean a lot to me, so seeing Christian gave me all the feels.

Update: he’s good and is officially a Boston boy minus the accent (but the accent is probably on the way). As he force fed me pita chips (I swear I didn’t even want them) I couldn’t help but think about how different life is now. It’s not a bad thing or a good thing, it’s just a thing and it’s an adventure and over a arugula bowl and a blackberry sage lemonade it was like time was paused and we we’re back to our 6:30 wildcat mornings.

And then because I love causing myself emotional distress I took a trip over to the legendary WJ for poms senior night. Spoiler: I cried and they were amazing. It was one of those moments when it really hits you that even after you leave, life keeps moving. Not going to lie, my first response to standing in the sound booth next to Coach K was panic that I wasn’t on the field. Believe me I totally don’t miss the stress of the season (think shin splints and mental breakdowns) but I miss the seconds of connection. The bonding over push-ups and pop tarts. The schools “most flexible team” was more devoted to sandwiches than stretching. Totally a team I belonged on.

And then it all comes back to MC. I think our relationship is primarily built on food & the fact that he loves the fat man inside me that can definitely out eat him any day. Long distance has proven to be more difficult than I thought when I wrote my first blog post a couple months ago. Weeks feel like years and sometimes there are tears where there wouldn’t normally be. It sucks and it drains you. But there’s still no one else I’d rather have watch me eat an entire box of gushers.

All in all, I think it’s more than the plate you order off the menu, it’s the experience and the memories that make the meal. I always hear the stories of my dad throwing bits of grilled scallops in the pool at the beach for me to swim around and scoop up and of my sister and I vacuuming edamame off our old wooden table with our mouths while chanting “Go Googoo Go!”

At Cava they always ask their employees their favorite food memory and I’ve always been dying to answer but when I really think about it I can’t pinpoint one moment that rises above the rest. My life has been a snack filled tornado of smiles and good fortune & I just want to thank food for giving me the grounds to get one forkful closer to all the people I love.

So what’s the point? Go out and eat and love it. Because with coffee comes a friend and with each bite comes a new story. 

Stuck in my head: Runaround Sue // Houndmouth
Snap this: Blue Heaven, KW

Sorry for my brief break there- 60 paged project due in 1 week killing me here. Condolences accepted in the form of gummy bears and money. 

Call Me an Honorary (insert Michigan’s mascot here)…

Live, love, Terps. All the way, baby. But I’ve gotta say… Michigan is pretty cool (literally and figuratively). This past weekend I took a little trip in time and lived it up with WJ Poms legend, Rachel (aka Rallen), and my main squeeze, Amanda_Stacy144, just like it was junior year and I was taking a break from SAT studying. Beyond being extremely excited to see the two people who understand every struggle I’ve ever faced, I was eager to get a look inside Amanda’s new life. Sorority, tailgating, restaurant hopping- new friends, new scene. I got to live it all and here’s how it went…

Day 1 in the Tundra: Let’s hit the highlights: I learned a wonderful lesson from my Uber driver about his past failed business ventures and how printer technology is a difficult field to break into. I developed a best friend crush on Amanda’s roommmate, Julia (please keep meeting stalker boys on the bus and cyberbullying Spoon accounts). I ate some salmon and salad at a cute little Italian place with Ral, Amandy, & friends from the floor (Courtney and Madi- you guys are perfect, never change.) We were serenaded with the Michigan fight song by the entire restaurant & an old person accapella group. Just so you know, they were not drunk, they were singing by choice. Michigan Alumni, am I right? Meal one ranked a 8/10 on the Holy Crap I Can Never Eat the Dining Hall Food Again Scale (HCICNEDHFA Scale), which is above a 5 so that’s pretty good food right there. Night time = Zeta (Amanda’s sorority) outdoor social themed 80s In Aspen. I wore a turtle neck sweater because it was 38 degrees and in 38 degrees themes are not my priority. The night ended with campus famous “feta bread” and a snuggley, too short, sleep in Amanda’s bed (feta bread was only a 6/10 on the HCICNEDHFA Scale, sorry Manders!)

Day 2 in the Tundra: Game Day the Mich Way! I’m going to summarize today in a series of phrases. Navy and Maize. Shivering. 9 miles of walking. Beer in my hair. Best sandwich I’ve ever had (Gbless Amer’s. 10/10 on the HCICNEDHFA Scale. Enter dreams of “The Georgia Reuben” and nightmares of the creepy old man that hit on me there). Napping. Exhausted giggle fest. Big Sean concert. I love Amanda and Rachel. BFC on Julia grows stronger. I found a bag of candy corn. 

Day 3 in the (slightly warmer) Tundra: Only needed 1 jacket today! Rachel and I went to breakfast at the famous Sava’s Restaurant where the floors were gorgeous and the food was even prettier (9/10 on the scale). Update: fried french toast should be called funnel cake on steriods. After some shopping I spent the rest of the day doing homework because it’s college. Not my college, but still college. Ended the day with pizza and candy corn (6/10 for the pizza, 10/10 for the candy corn #weakness) & woke up to Amanda taking pictures of me sleeping (I am an adorable sleeper so I don’t know what you’re going to do with those).

Overall, I was super sad to leave Michigan & even sadder that I had to wake up at 5:45 am to make my flight. I definietely didn’t fall in love with cold weather and the trek from central campus to Amanda’s dorm on North but it made me nostalgic and sad to think that my best friend has a new life that I’m not really part of anymore. I’m not being dramatic, I am obviously still important to her and we are still very much in each other’s lives, but she has things/does things that I don’t know and for the first time, it’s okay that I don’t know. College does that. I don’t really like it, but I have to live with it. Of course I’m selfish and wish that I slept in the bed next to hers (watch out Julia, I’ll be back), but out of all the possible scenarios I am happiest leaving her knowing how perfect Michigan and her friends are for her there. 

Thank you for an amazing weekend, I should probably Google what your mascot is since I am now a “Michigan Friend” & have a t-shirt to prove it.

Stuck in my head: Will You Love Me Forever? // Margo and the Nuclear So And So’s
Snap it: Sava’s Restaurant // Ann Arbor

Shoutout to Julia, Courtney, & Madi- you guys are troopers. Sorry I exposed Amanda’s weirdest self. Good luck getting the baby voice to stop. Peace, love, tracking pee. 

Rachel- gbless your photo & friendship skills. I know you don’t read these, but maybe one day you’ll see this. You hate hugs, but I am sending you a virtual one right now. 1, 2, 3… sent! 

Amandastacy_144- See you soon, text you sooner. Don’t be a stranger. Ever. Or I will probably end up dead. Thanks for making my big life decisions and writing my text messages for me. One last thing- “Why you do dat?” (All of this was written in baby voice and should be read in baby voice) 

Things I’ve Learned This Week…

This week has been one of those where you think the next day is always Friday but it was really like Tuesday and all you can do is pray for yourself and hope that you make it out alive. Update: tomorrow is actually friday but I am barely alive. 

11 internship hours, 10 studying hours, 4 lectures, and a ton of unfinished homework later I have put myself in a stress coma curable only by Ibuprofen and Girls. But wait, it’s not over. The main source of my panic is this huge business midterm that’s, wait for it, tonight. After my classes. And is 3 hours long.

This week has been enlightening for me in the differences between college and high school (more to come on this in the future), stress and relaxation, and the chaos of balancing three million things at once.

Here are the top 5 things I learned this week & now never want to learn again because I swear, anymore educational experiences and my head will pop off my body.

  1. It’s okay to eat three meals in the span of an hour and then eat Cava too. If it makes you happy and doesn’t put you in a permanent food coma then embrace your ability to store food inside you and take advantage. At least I ate like a king yesterday. Makes the rest of my study-filled night seem less tragic.
  2. Don’t skip a class if it’s just going to stress you out to the point that you read all the lecture slides while you’re skipping and you can’t even enjoy the comfort of your bed. Believe me. I’m currently living this. I mean I’m sick and sitting at my desk studying and writing this; I could’ve just been sick sitting in a lecture hall learning about consumer preferences and game theory (these are econ topics for all you uncultured swine out there). I just want to watch TV in peace but instead I have the mental picture of my next exam being in gibberish. Cue me pouring over a textbook for the next hour.
  3. Healthy food & stress stomach are not even close to being friends.  Just give your body what it needs: pizza, candy, french fries. I haven’t indulged yet but it’s coming. I can’t take the tofu and grilled chicken lifestyle this week.  Pass the pasta, please. I just need to feel a little joy and thrill.
  4. I am prone to charley horses and they are my mortal enemy now. I don’t know what causes them but I have been downing water like it’s holy and eating too many bananas so don’t give me that dehydration potassium shit. I just want the truth. 
  5. It is really nice to have a really nice boss. Yesterday, because my week wasn’t hellish enough, I forgot my dorm key in DC and had no way into my room/no idea how I was going to make it a week without my key. Answer: I would’ve had to pay $70 and get my locks changed. That would’ve been horrible and I would’ve gone hungry because that’s like all my birthday money (okay fine, not actually. I’m just a little bit of a drama queen & I like having flair). Anyway, my Mother Theresa of a mentor drove my key to me and saved my entire life basically. So thank you, Marissa. You are officially in my Best People Ever book next to my parents and Amy Schumer. 

So now unfortunately, my time is up and I must return to the world of responsibility, body aches, and frustration. Wish me luck. I’m gonna need it. 

Stuck in my head: Seventeen // Alessia Cara
Snap it: 14th street, DC

Mantra of this week: Do it because you have no choice and you are not lame. Don’t feel sorry for yourself. You have a great life and lots of opportunities to succeed. Amen. 

Disclaimer: I really am not horribly stressed. I am just normally 1% stressed and now I am about a 70-80% stressed. But not 100%. I’m not great at math, but that means it could be a hell of a lot worse than it is right now. 

Here’s What Happens When You Get 12 Hours With Your Given. 

Some teenagers live in angst and hate their families and write poetry about how tortured they are. I would classify myself as the opposite kind of person. I would trade a night on the town for 98% lean hamburgers with my parents any day. And no, it’s not just because free food. Okay, it’s a little but because of the food but mostly because they just get me. They really get me.

Last night, for the first time since school started, our family was almost whole again. With the exception of my Aunt Kris’s crew, my family as I knew it before college came together and had another entertaining dinner where topics ranged from dairy-free ice cream to the boy my Grandma wants my cousin to marry (Max Flax, am I right?).

I don’t think I realized how different home would feel without my cousin/partner in crime/best friend. Let’s call her Sara. But only for storytelling purposes. The first family function was strange, not going to lie. And no, not because conversation revolved around vodka-soaked tampons, that’s relatively normal, but because my sister still had her best friend there, Jake was still a loner, & now I was talking college midterms with my uncle instead of high school drama with my best friend. It honestly felt like a major loss to me. Was this a funeral or Rosh Hashana dinner? Okay, funeral is a little extreme, I mean she’s just in Ohio and we Facetimed her in, but still… loss is loss.

The funny thing is Sara and I barely ever talk outside of opinions on what to post on Instagram while we’re at school. I couldn’t tell you the names of her best friends before this weekend (I could tell you their Instagram handles though) and I had no idea she’d tried going to the gym twice since school started (So proud. Keep it up!). So when she crossed the street and gave me a hug outside the DC food truck festival we were meeting at I expected it to feel like a magical reunion, but instead it was more like “Why are we hugging? We never hug.”

Bottom line, it felt like no time had passed. She was still my mini, snot-filled, super trendy cousin. And we were in DC pretending to be hip 20-somethings eating fancy ice cream. Typical. 

Family has always been #1 to me but I think it didn’t hit me that I was not going to college with Sara until she came back to visit. & I know she’s having an amazing time, but the selfish monster inside me hopes she decides to transfer and come back home. Not actually. I mean Ohio State seems amazing and she has such an awesome life there. I just miss her. Sue me if that’s so wrong. 

Sitting around the table on Sunday night everything was totally old-school for a minute. I had my person to make eye contact with when our Dads made uncomfortable, overly sexual jokes. Saying goodbye was like when we said hello- it didn’t feel real. I’m not wishing her well until Thanksgiving. That’s crazy talk… But it’s also real talk. 
So I guess what I’m saying is college is great and I’m so happy you’re happy, but I miss my given. Until this year you weren’t going anywhere, you were a guarantee, but all of a sudden there’s 403 miles between us and I’m not totally a fan. I mean who else is obligated by blood to hang out with me and take long trips to the bathrooom with me and  finish internship projects with me? It’s only 2 months of 4 years, and I bet I’ll get used to it, but right now I just can’t wait until Winter break & the adventures that await us. Even though it’ll probably more like Christmas movies and Buredo in my bed because who actually likes the cold?

So here’s my only request- Don’t forget about our plans to move in together after school. You still say NYC but I’m team DC now. Guess we’ll see where we end up.  I just hope it’s together in a trendy little apartment that we’ll barely be able to afford. Because to both of us, being broke in city is just training for being rich in the city. 

Will I keep missing you? Buck yeah. Are you still my given? No doubt about it. 

Stuck in my head: Kids // MGMT
Snap it: DC Food Truck Festival

Doodie!! Miss you always!! Keep me updated!! I promise I will survive! 

“Doodie”- (affectionate nickname, f) The female version of dude, term for best friend, sometimes also referred to as “dood”, not to be confused with Doodoo or dudette