Some teenagers live in angst and hate their families and write poetry about how tortured they are. I would classify myself as the opposite kind of person. I would trade a night on the town for 98% lean hamburgers with my parents any day. And no, it’s not just because free food. Okay, it’s a little but because of the food but mostly because they just get me. They really get me.
Last night, for the first time since school started, our family was almost whole again. With the exception of my Aunt Kris’s crew, my family as I knew it before college came together and had another entertaining dinner where topics ranged from dairy-free ice cream to the boy my Grandma wants my cousin to marry (Max Flax, am I right?).
I don’t think I realized how different home would feel without my cousin/partner in crime/best friend. Let’s call her Sara. But only for storytelling purposes. The first family function was strange, not going to lie. And no, not because conversation revolved around vodka-soaked tampons, that’s relatively normal, but because my sister still had her best friend there, Jake was still a loner, & now I was talking college midterms with my uncle instead of high school drama with my best friend. It honestly felt like a major loss to me. Was this a funeral or Rosh Hashana dinner? Okay, funeral is a little extreme, I mean she’s just in Ohio and we Facetimed her in, but still… loss is loss.
The funny thing is Sara and I barely ever talk outside of opinions on what to post on Instagram while we’re at school. I couldn’t tell you the names of her best friends before this weekend (I could tell you their Instagram handles though) and I had no idea she’d tried going to the gym twice since school started (So proud. Keep it up!). So when she crossed the street and gave me a hug outside the DC food truck festival we were meeting at I expected it to feel like a magical reunion, but instead it was more like “Why are we hugging? We never hug.”
Bottom line, it felt like no time had passed. She was still my mini, snot-filled, super trendy cousin. And we were in DC pretending to be hip 20-somethings eating fancy ice cream. Typical.
Family has always been #1 to me but I think it didn’t hit me that I was not going to college with Sara until she came back to visit. & I know she’s having an amazing time, but the selfish monster inside me hopes she decides to transfer and come back home. Not actually. I mean Ohio State seems amazing and she has such an awesome life there. I just miss her. Sue me if that’s so wrong.
Sitting around the table on Sunday night everything was totally old-school for a minute. I had my person to make eye contact with when our Dads made uncomfortable, overly sexual jokes. Saying goodbye was like when we said hello- it didn’t feel real. I’m not wishing her well until Thanksgiving. That’s crazy talk… But it’s also real talk.
So I guess what I’m saying is college is great and I’m so happy you’re happy, but I miss my given. Until this year you weren’t going anywhere, you were a guarantee, but all of a sudden there’s 403 miles between us and I’m not totally a fan. I mean who else is obligated by blood to hang out with me and take long trips to the bathrooom with me and finish internship projects with me? It’s only 2 months of 4 years, and I bet I’ll get used to it, but right now I just can’t wait until Winter break & the adventures that await us. Even though it’ll probably more like Christmas movies and Buredo in my bed because who actually likes the cold?
So here’s my only request- Don’t forget about our plans to move in together after school. You still say NYC but I’m team DC now. Guess we’ll see where we end up. I just hope it’s together in a trendy little apartment that we’ll barely be able to afford. Because to both of us, being broke in city is just training for being rich in the city.
Will I keep missing you? Buck yeah. Are you still my given? No doubt about it.
Stuck in my head: Kids // MGMT
Snap it: DC Food Truck Festival
Doodie!! Miss you always!! Keep me updated!! I promise I will survive!
“Doodie”- (affectionate nickname, f) The female version of dude, term for best friend, sometimes also referred to as “dood”, not to be confused with Doodoo or dudette